Monolog Seekor Kambing Tua

Monolog Seekor Kambing Tua

Dulu…

Dulu aku dan kau bukan main lagi kamceng…

Dulu aku dan kau kawan baik…

Dulu aku selalu puji kau…

Dulu aku sembah-sembah kau…

Dulu aku selalu main berdiri di belakang kau..

Dulu aku sentiasa sedia dengan ayat power gila babi aku “Berdiri Teguh Di Belakang Kau”

Dulu aku tidak pernah miss soru buat banner “Menyokong Penuh Kepimpinan Kau”

Sekarang…

Sekarang kau tikam aku dari belakang!!??

Sekarang kau panggil aku racist!!??

Bedebah kau!

Kita putus kawan!! :twisted:

I kissed a girl…. not :P

It is Friday!!!

It is been a week since I landed in Kuching 😀 I am adjusting to the peaceful, quiet life in Kuching. Nothing to complain so far. Food is good. Traffic is fine. No, I do not miss the traffic jam in Klang Valley, Angeles. Thanks for the MMS anyway 😛 (Hey! Don’t take photo while driving!! :lol:) Air is fresh. I can sleep well at night without hearing Mat Rempits Cemerlangs revving their Kapchais or Ah Bengs blasting their ‘Tits Tet-No’ music.. and in the morning I can wake up at peace without stupid cars honking at each other like it will make the cars in front of them go faster. Kuching girls? No time to check it out yet. Cibol said, no photo no talk, so I normally keep the photos to myself… so no need talk lah about girls. Nyahahahahahaha!!

Wait, just one thing, I need to get it out from my system. My workplace’s canteen is simply a kitchen from hell!!!!s simply a kitchen from hell!!! Poorly cooked food, with ridiculous pricing. Imagine my horror on my 1st day when the cashier said RM6.80 for my ‘economy rice’ – rice, curry chicken and ladies’ fingers. WTF? I asked her again, probably my hearing got problem after the flight from previous day. “Henam hinggit lapan.” (Six ringgit eighty).

Hey! I paid much cheaper price when I was in Phileo Damansara and the place supposed to be among the places that charge slightly higher than other places in KL!!! Now in Kuching??? RM6.80 for ‘economy rice?’ Very economic indeed. Crap.:twisted: Well, I paid RM6.80 for a tasteless curry chicken and overcooked rice. :vangry: I just found out, there are not many choices of food served and if you go to the canteen for lunch slightly later than 12.45pm you need to scrap whatever leftover there and there is only one operator there. Monopoly. Never good for consumers.

On the 1st day I went for lunch at 1pm, so nothing to complain, only the sorry looking chicken curry and ladies fingers left but the next day I went there…. Well, not worth to mention. I am getting food from outside since then and planning to pack from home. The canteen has a long list of menu but when you want to order this particular item, you get the answer “Takda” (Not available). Hoi! Please do not put it in the menu lah if you are not serving it! :mad: Doesn’t it annoy you to the max when you are given the menu and when you order your food, this doesn’t have, that is not available.. bla bla??

Eh, sorry.. Friday supposed to be a happy merry sissy sexy post but end up writing 3 paragraph dissing the poor canteen. :lol: Hmm.. Friday’s night in Kuching.. do what? Any suggestion? Go fishing at the waterfront? Better stay home, change lifestyle. :mrgreen:

I saw this song on TV just now. Damn cheesy.. pretty gay also. STP sure like. Have a great Friday and horny crazy weekends people! :arrow:

ps: Gotcha with the post title!! :razz:

Katy Perry – I Kissed A Girl

This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It’s not what, I’m used to
Just wanna try you on
I’m curious for you
Caught my attentionI kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

No, I don’t even know your name
It doesn’t matter
You’re my experimental game
Just human nature
It’s not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

Us girls we are so magical
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain’t no big deal, it’s innocent

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

The Truth About Fuel Subsidy

This is a great piece from Kickdefella. He wrote a lengthy essay to explain the truth about fuel subsidy. I am reproducing his essay here which was written in Bahasa Melayu after translating it into English. My sincerest apology in advance if I did a bad translation job.

Hassan, Husam and The Truth About Fuel Subsidy

Last night, Hassan Marican appeared on National Television willingly to bare all about Petronas. Unfortunately, the only answer he should have given last night to those stupid panels (and moderator) was “Bloody hell, what a stupid question! Go and **PAKLAH** yourself la!” but he remained calm though.

Most probably the instruction was to grill him as though the increase of fuel prices is all Petronas faults.

Meanwhile, Last week, before leaving for Dubai, Dato’ Husam Musa called for a Press Conference to reveal all the facts and to justify his claim that it is not necessary for the government to increase fuel prices. It is also to give his insights on how actually it is possible to reduce the fuel prices.

Unfortunately, none of it ever came out in the mainstream papers although we have about 30 journalist and broadcaster packing the small office. The TVPAS reporter came ten minutes later and arrogantly left the room because the session already started. As a result, the session goes unrecorded. It was a total blackout on what was said and PAS official organ too play a role in it.

I have written in this blog all the facts and have published the figures to justify the claim where many are more interested to use rhetoric and to show the slimy strength by demonstrating and cause misery to the already much affected taxi drivers and shoppers in KL.

To some politicians, it is easier to get your photos and story published in newspaper by behaving like hooligans in public places yet when you got the chance to speak up, only buckets of nonsense do come out.

Today I will continue with my essay and we will discuss how it is possible to reduce the price of fuel prices and to put a stop in the already escalating cost of living.

Government Has Not Been Truthful Regarding the Fuel Subsidy

The government claimed that it would spend close to RM40 billion (I read somewhere it is RM56 billion??) this year for fuel subsidy. This is actually a lie, or an attempt by the government to mislead the people.

The facts are:

• Government does not come up with any cost, even one cent for fuel subsidy.
• Fuel subsidy is not included in government’s expenditure
• There is no actually no fuel subsidy. Zilch. Nil.
• The government only spends money for toll subsidy, public transportation subsidy, food subsidy and other subsidies not for fuel subsidy.

Because of that, the following statement by the Second Finance Minister Nor Mohamed Yakcop is not accurate and intended to mislead the people.

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Data provided by Treasury Malaysia clearly not as mentioned by the Second Finance Minister, Cabinet Ministers, Abdullah Ahmad Badawi and also Khairy Jamaluddin during Umno General Assembly 2007.

Data from the Treasury show the following information:

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According to the Treasury Report in Table 6.3, Federal Government Operating Expenditure, total subsidies spent in 2007 is RM12.1 billion which is 9.8% from RM124 billion government operating expenditure. In 2008, total subsidies is predicted to be RM10.1 billion or 7.8% from the total RM129 billion government operation expenditure allocation that was approved in 2008 Budget.

(click on photo for bigger image)

This clearly shows that expenditure to manage fuel subsidy is never included in government expenditure because:

• Operating expenditure data by Treasury shows a lesser amount and obviously not sufficient to sustain the total subsidies which allegedly estimated at RM40 billion.

• Total fuel subsidy is not included in other data inside government’s account as recorded in Treasury’s
Annual Report.

So, where the subsidy comes from? The fuel subsidy actually never exists. Fuel for domestic use is obtained through:

• Crude oil exchange mechanism.
• 400k barrels of higher grade crude oil ‘Tapis Blend’ – highest crude oil grade will be exchanged in global market with domestic crude oil demand.
• This crude oil after being processed into petrol and diesel is sold to people at price determined by the government.
• The government gets net profit (because the government never spends anything) from the tax paid by petroleum companies, petrol stations and other suppliers.

Is it true Malaysia’s crude oil reserves will last in another few years?

Lately, the people were told that Malaysia’s crude oil reserves won’t last much longer and this country will be a net importer of oil. This is used by the government to justify the increase of fuel prices and cut ‘fuel subsidy’ to prepare the people with market price when the country starts to import oil for domestic use.

However, Petronas 2006 Annual Report recorded that Malaysia’s crude oil reserves can last until 2024.

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Hassan Marican, Acting chairman, President and Chief Executive Officer of Petronas meanwhile explained to the media that in 2011, Malaysia will become net importer of oil because the domestic demand will exceed the country’s crude oil output. This means that domestic demand for crude oil will be more than 700k barrels per day. But this is in 2011 and coming, the country will still able to produce 700k barrels of crude oil per day, which he never refuted.

According to Petronas Annual Report since 1980, Malaysia’s crude oil reserves is increasing and not decreasing. In 1980, it was reported Malaysia’s crude oil reserves stand at 3 billion barrels, and since then we had produce more than 4 billion barrels and up to now, we still produce around 650k to 200k barrels per day for 365 days and this at this rate we can last for another 20 years.

The fact is that this country’s crude oil reserves are increasing and not decreasing. In 2008, we have crude oil reserves estimated at 4 billion barrels and Malaysia is placed at number 28th among countries in the world with largest oil reserves.

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Malaysia’s crude oil reserves will not finish so soon. This is because Petronas, a petroleum company owned by the rakyat invest hundreds of million every year for oil exploration all over the world. From the investment, we found new reserves and according to the same report, the reserves replacement ratio currently is 1:1.8 liter. This translated as, for very 1 liter used, Petronas found 1.8 liter new reserves. This means the replacement rate is higher than the usage rate.

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Fuel Price Reduction Is Not Impossible

To optimise profit from crude oil, the government does not have to increase fuel price. The government actually can optimise its profit by reducing the fuel price at the same time.

Reducing the Usage of Petrol and Diesel

Fuel price in Malaysia is the highest among oil producing countries. Based on population of 26 million and crude oil output rate at 650k-700k barrels per day, Malaysia has a very high output ratio but this has not benefited its population which is far lower than the rest of the oil producers.

Petrol and diesel priced should be reduced and this is possibly done. Among the measures to reduce the price are:

Changing from petrol and diesel usage to natural gas for cars or NGV (Natural Gas Vehicles) should be done because of these factors:

• Malaysia is the 13th largest natural gas reserves country in the world. In 2004, Dato’ Mustapha Mohamed announced that Malaysia’s natural gas reserves is estimated at around 89 trillion cubic feet.
• The government encourages the usage of NGV because it is cleaner and environmental friendly but never make it compulsory for every petrol station to provide this service. As a result, there are limited number of NGV stations and mostly only available in Klang Valley.
• Wide usage of NGV by vehicles will reduce the demands for petrol and diesel.
• Malaysia can sell more crude oil and this will bring more profit to the country.
• Price of petrol and diesel can be further reduced using this extra profit

National Petroleum Advisory Council

National Petroleum Advisory Council (NPAC) should be formed again to gather experts that will involve in planning the energy usage and shaping efficient energy policies for the country. NPAC was formed together with Petronas before but it does no longer exist now.

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Petronas reaps high profit each year. As a company that is tasked to manage the national treasure owned by the people of Malaysia, Petronas organisation structure should focus on guarding the people’s interest. It is important NPAC to be revived, by choosing credible candidates and not for the sake of ‘political selection’. In other words, revival of NPAC means nothing if it is used to for political mileage by ‘expired’ UMNO politicians such as Abdul Rahim Thamby Chik or Zainuddin Maidin.

Check and Balance in Petronas

Currently, Tan Sri Dato’ Mohd. Hassan Merican holds the three highest posts in Petronas – Acting chairman, President and Chief Executive Officer. Before this, two of these positions were held by different individuals.

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Without trying to discredit the achievements and success brought by Tan Sri Dato’ Seri Mohd. Hassan Marican since helming Petronas, by holding to these three positions, Tan Sri Dato’ Seri Mohd. Hassan Marican becomes too powerful and this hampers check and balance inside Petronas and affects the transparency in managing Petronas.

Conclusion

People should enjoy the benefits of prosperity from the global oil price increase. As a net exporter of crude oil, the oil price increase should be translated as an additional income to the country.

Unfortunately, not only people cannot reap the benefits from the country resources, people are burdened with the fuel price increase which generated ripple effects to the price of consumer items.

Based on the arguments and data provided, it proven that the government decision to increase the fuel price is baseless.

This is the proof of poor planning and management under the government of Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi. People should insist for their rights to enjoy benefits as an oil producing country and call the government to reduce the fuel price. If this is not carried out, the country’s economy will decline and people will suffer not only the direct consequences but also need to face the social problems arise from it.

Give Back the People’s Rights Now! :arrow:

Home-cooked meal, anyone??

Nothing beats a home-cooked meal. :up: You know it is true when you read something like this:

Chimps, bonobos, gorillas and orang-utans all seem to prefer cooked food to raw forms of meat, sweet potatoes and carrots, a team of anthropologists has found.

This suggests that our ancestors had an innate preference for cooked meals, and probably started cooking as soon as they wielded fire, says Richard Wrangham, an anthropologist at Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts, US, who led the new study.

“It would not be long before bits of food would get accidentally cooked and if they liked it they would do it again,” he told New Scientist.

Wrangham is using the finding that apes liked cooked food to support his argument that cooking was pivotal in human evolution.

(source: New Scientist)

:grin: :grin:

Every now and then, when I am on the roll I will try to cook my own meal. Biasalah, syiok sendiri :oops: Right Melbie? 😛

Fried Tilapia coated with Thick Soy Sauce

Stir fried Cangkuk Manis with Egg. (Cangkuk Manis – Sweet Greens? Nyahahaha!)

Ginger Chicken (added few stalks of Lemongrass while making the gravy.. :up:)

The Feast! – Spinach soup, Cangkuk Manis and Ginger Chicken

Buddha Jumps Over the Wall Stir Fried Bamboo Shoots, Fried Tilapia and Spinach Soup (again…) :razz:

ps: I am ‘changing my lifestyle’ as what our wise Pak Lah and Najib told us to. :arrow: Support home-cooked meal! :up:

Wee~! I see $_$!!

I was reading The Malaysian Insider and I saw some interesting comments. I ‘presented’ a similar proposal to Noktah Hitam and Cibol that day 😛 No they were not interested. I am not exactly a crook, trying to take an advantage of the situation and I do not have the money either hehe.. More important is this highlights how lousy our government in making plans and implentations.

Here’s a money-making scheme. Well if I don’t do this, somebody will, eventually.

I’m going to go out and buy 4 more of those RM800 all-but-broken-down 1979 Mazda/Suzuki/Nissan. Then I will buy another 5 for my father (who has a license), 5 for my mother (who has a license), 5 for my handicapped tenant (who will get a license by bribery), and 5 for each of my 2 children, as soon as they are permitted to get a license …

Then we will apply for the subsidies, and we should be getting RM625 for each car from POS. Then we need to pay about RM90 for the discounted road tax. We net RM535 for each car.

Woo wee! That is 67% annual return! (535/800)

Other than my first car, we don’t really drive all the other 23 broken down cars. We have zero fuel cost there. So we have 23 “investment” cars costing us RM18,400 one time cost, and RM12,305 yearly subsidy income less road tax. Just sitting there, making the money from subsidy!

Beats fixed deposit any time. Investment recoup in less than 2 years! What business on earth will give you 67% return every year? Only in Malaysia. Malaysia Boleh again!

May be it’s a Finance Ministry conspiracy to revive the second-hand Proton market.

Now, I only need to find the parking space …

But then I don’t even have to. Junk metals are selling at a good price these days.

****************

This cash subsidies for fuel will give rise to “phantom cars.” This is especially easy later, when the government allows agents to cash the subsidies (without owners having to appear in person) because of the immense workload. This WILL happen, as soon a you realize there will be a few million car owners mobbing the 683 post office.

Even after a 40-year-old car is smashed into junk metal, its “paper-soul” (ownership certificate) will live on forever. The paper will be traded around, for buyers to collect, farm-out, and register in the names of relatives, maids, homeless people, deceased voters, etc.

The main broker then collects government subsidies yearly. It is a legitimate business for Ah Long to enter into. Also for DVD pirates and retired grandpas.

The broker/entrepreneur can also repackage and sell a whole stack of certificates around. Investors will bid up the price until the return falls toward a business-return rate, say 20%, but not as low as the nearly risk-less bank deposit rate.

That means, a RM1,000 old car certificate can probably rise 3x or so to RM3,000 when sold as a stack of ownership certificate. The first-comer broker/entrepreneur will then pocket the capital gain. The late comer collect the steady stream of subsidies. This is an innovation similar to real-estate or credit-card “securitization” that is causing so much trouble in World finance today.

Malaysia will be awash with phantom cars, which do not appear in traffic or car parks. Only in government records. Just like some of our voters.

****************

Same with Selangor water.

If I need to use more water than the basic amount, I’ll just apply for a second tap in my mother’s name. And a third water meter, in my grandfather’s name. And a fourth water meter in my maid’s name.

Then I can use 4x minimum amount! Free.

I can even sell water… to the tourist and restaurant next door …

****************

So I heard Pos Malaysia is making a killing.. Ten percent – 10% service charge for transactions done at their counter? 10% is a lot! Just for the latest hoo haa.. the fuelrebate, 10% out of RM625 is RM62.50 and registered vehicles in Malaysia is around 12-15 million? Well, let us put the estimated number of cars in Malaysia eligible for the fuel rebate at 6 million.

RM62.50 x 6 mil = RM375,000,000. Even just one percent – 1% is a staggering figure of RM37.5 million.

Millions to be collected, just from the petrol rebate ‘exercise’. So, why wait? Go and buy Pos Malaysia shares now 😀

ps: Ehem, I heard RUMOUR that Pos Malaysia is belong to ECM Libra. Question, who owns ECM Libra? 😈

pss: RUMOUR not to be taken seriously 🙂 Rumour is akin to masturbation, it is just for self satisfaction. Nyahahahaha!

psss: Scrap metal now is around RM300- RM400 per tonne now. Go do your own calculation. :grin: Find your buyers here. Scrap metal now is around RM300- RM400 per tonne now. Go do your own calculation. Find your buyers here. Malaysia has among the highest scrap metal buyers according to that website!!! No wonder manhole covers, drain gratings or anything metal around us are missing!! :vangry:

 

Back in the Land of Hornbills!

Tired..

For the last few days.. busy sorting my stuffs to be packed.

The war zone..

I thought I could pack all this in just 2 bags.. how wrong haha!

End up getting a big-ass bag. Easily can stuff STP in. :up:

Off I go!

At the ‘ketupat’ hall  😀

I reached Kuching around 12pm yesterday.. went to Holiday Inn to check in. My nose was killing me. I was having a bit of flu.. keep sneezing on the plane, damn embarassing. I am allergic to dust.. was sneezing all the time while packing my luggage already 😛 On the plane, I couldn’t control the flowing of mucus from my nose either, the thing just ‘free flow’ from my left nostril nyahahahahahha! End up stuffing my nostrils with tissues 😀 I contemplated to take some photos.. but decided to spare you good people from those disgusting photos :p Some obligatory photos to be taken as someone who has a blog before I went to take my nap 😀

Then I went to sleep.. I even missed the match between Spain and Sweden 😥 So I woke up this morning, rewarded myself with a plate of oily, tasty KOLO MEE! 😀 😀 😀

(Image source: vkeong.com)

It is good to be back in the Land of the Hornbills! *wandering around in loincloth arming with Digi WIDE-ASS connection hunting for hornbills…* Adios!

Friday the 13th

Friday the 13th.

Watched Incredible Hulk last Wednesday. Verdict? 6/10.

A lot of chases, transformation into the green monster and back again, a love story, and two monsters clawing at each other as the villain becomes a monster, too. A lot of noise. It is a lot better than Ang Lee’s Hulk. Not very much a typical comic movie, well, you actually can watch it minus the special effects and it is still good.

Edward Norton is always an interesting actor, and he brings a distinctive presence to the proceedings. Remember Fight Club? Go watch it for the supersize ‘wrestling’ actions 🙂 (and Liv Tyler.. :XO: :XO:) Oh, Tony Stark also appears in the movie 😀 Who? Clue: Ironman :arrow:

This is something to read on a gloomy Friday 😀

Malaysian Mathematician

It is most alarming that many Malaysian schools teach our children the wrong things. I mean can the children really apply what they are taught in school later in life? For example, can you imagine a mathematics question in a recent examination as follows?

“If an egg costs fifty sen, and if you buy 1/8 of the egg, how much would you have to pay ?”

Who in Heaven’s name will want to buy 1/8 of an egg ? The shopkeeper will probably think you are crazy and he will be equally stupid to break the egg and measure 1/8 for you.

Yet, this is how they structure the questions in Malaysian schools. Why not pose questions that would be more useful later in life when you go out into the world to earn your living ?

To help Malaysia ‘s Ministry of Education to better face the realities of life, we are suggesting some questions they could use in our classrooms.

QUESTION 1.

If you drive from Kuala Lumpur to Penang along the PLUS Highway and there are four speed traps along the way and if each speed trap would cost you RM300.00 in fines, how much in fines would you accumulate by the time you reach Penang ?

ANSWER (Choose one):

1. I would not suffer any fines as the oncoming cars would flash their headlights and I would slow down before coming to the speed trap.

2. I would only need to pay a total of RM80.00 as I would pay a RM20.00 bribe at each speed trap.

3. I would not be stopped as I am an AMNO Wakil Rakyat so I am exempted from speed traps.

QUESTION 2.

If your company is awarded a RM150 million government contract, and you make a 20% profit, how much profit would be at the end of the contract period ?

ANSWER (Choose one):

1. I will not be making a 20% profit as I would have to pay the Minister 10% and AMNO 5%.

2. I would make 30% profit, which is the progress payment I receive, after which I will abandon the project and let the government call for re-tender.

3. My company will not make any profit at all as I will siphon out all the profits and show a loss to avoid paying corporate tax.

QUESTION 3.

If the ruling party obtained 54% of the popular votes the last election and won 151 or 80% of the seats, and if it saw an increase of 10% in votes this election, how many more seats would it gain?

ANSWER (Choose one):

1. The ruling party will not show a 10% increase in votes, as it will stuff the ballot box with another 20% to give it a 30% vote increase.

2. The ruling party will win which are the newly created seats in the delineation exercise recently done.

3. The ruling party has already decided it will win 90% of the seats and the votes have nothing to do with it.

QUESTION 4.

If the national petroleum company, Petronas, pays a 5% royalty to Terengganu State and if the amount paid is RM800,000,000 per year, how much should Petronas have in the bank accumulated over the last 25 years ?

ANSWER (Choose one):

1. Nobody is supposed to know as Petronas need not show its accounts to anyone except the Prime Minister and this information comes under the Official Secrets Act.

2. Petronas earns only 50% of its petroleum revenue from Terengganu so Petronas’ total income accumulated in the banks over 25 years should be RM800 billion.

3. Petronas has nothing accumulated in the bank as all the money will be spent bailing out companies and finance mega projects.

*****************************************

And this something to play on a boring Friday:

I am flying to Kuching tomorrow 10am. Good bye and see you somewhere in the nearest future people!

Signing off with a song 🙂

The Calling – Wherever You Will Go
So lately, I’ve been wonderin
Who will be there to take my place
When I’m gone, you’ll need love
To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
And between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own

[Chorus:]
If I could, then I would
I’ll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I’ll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I’ll find out
The way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
Well I hope there’s someone out there
Who can bring me back to you

[Chorus]

Runaway with my heart
Runaway with my hope
Runaway with my love

I know now, just quite how
My life and love might still go on
In your heart and your mind
I’ll stay with you for all of time

[Chorus]

If I could turn back time
I’ll go wherever you will go
If I could make you mine
I’ll go wherever you will go