Stupid old fucks.

Some people are just so damn good at pulling things from their ass they should make a living out of the act, literally. They can come up with all kinda shit you would not imagine it is possible to begin with.

I have issues with old farts. Not so much the age but the way of thinking, the way of doing things. Old farts tend to be a little too sensitive, perceiving anyone and anything as a threat to their pathetic, shriveled and wrinkled physical life. Heck they’re the perfect poster boy for anything sensitive. Think of…. Datuk Seri Utama Rais Yatim. Ha! Ha! Ha! You would think that maybe for some people, when they are getting older some strange things happened to them, not in a very good way. They are so sensitive they are literally walking clitoris and you really do not want to get yourself wet walking in their path. Either that or their brain just turned into that elusive G-spot, because they do not use it that often anyway, pulling things from their ass all the time.

Old farts love to talk about respect. Being a fairly young guy (still), I get that shit a lot. “Hey you young punk, you are not showing me enough respect.” Or they would bitch to people that they cannot work with people that don’t show them respect. Respect my ass. Why? To them, everything you do or not doing is taken a sign of respect or disrespect.

Let me give you a scenario, it may or may not have anything to do with the living and dead people. Just a story.

Pretentious Old Fart told you that before you do anything in his ‘territory’, you have to inform, ask for his permission bla bla.. (as a sign of respect lah). Fair enough. So you would inform him, get his permission on all kind of shits you are going to do. Then somehow Pretentious Old Fart found it annoying that you have to go through him on all kind of shits before doings anything. So he told you in a very oldie-fartsy way, “Hey everything also you have to ask me ah? You think my managers are useless? This kind of small thing, unimportant crap you can get them to make decisions. I don’t want to know.” Fair enough. So you would make your own judgment from then, for small, unimportant shit you would go directly to his dogs managers/staffs, for big and sensitive thing you would go to him. Then one fine day, while you were doing ’small, unimportant shit’ that should not be bothered by him, Pretentious Old Fart screamed over the phone, “Why you do things without telling me? Are you trying to be funny? You are not giving me enough respect. Bla bla bla.”

Either ways you are screwed. Follow his instruction to get him involved and he thinks that you are trying to be funny by getting him ‘too involved’ with your shits, he would go ape shit. Do not follow his instruction, you will definitely in deep shit. Try to follow his ad hoc instruction, weave to accommodate him, he is still going bat-shit crazy because he is sonofabitchmuthafuckacrazyasshole. Geddit?

For me, first and most important thing as a modern slave paid to do shit, I make sure I get the shit done. Respect, well that comes later, as I size you up whether you are to be treated with respect or not. The thing about respect, it is earned. Of course as young people, we are expected and taught to respect the elders which I refer as old farts in this post. I am not sure for what basis but I think we should respect people. Not some discriminating ageism crap from some old farts.

And I respect people looking at how they do things. How they carry themselves. I am pretty sure that generally, I have good social skills, meaning I know my shit around people. I do not go around with this weird new age thinking or mantra that I will do my things and while in the process I hope to offend as many pathetic, easily offended sensitive souls.

I think most of the disagreements and conflicts I had with some old farts were due to the same stupid reason humans are still fighting and killing each other to this day – power. Not that physic power lah, the power associated with authority, the measured ability to control one’s environment, and behaviour of other entities. And the study of power in a society is referred to as…. politics, my friends. Politics. Not a new conflict, always we have new ideas (often associated with young punks) vs old ideas (perpetuated by old farts). Just look at this country, especially in Sarawak. Both sides of the divide have this problem.

Put it this way, I would not have problem with any old fart if they are accommodating and bestow the same respect and trust for little shit like me, which they are dying for. It works both ways. And so far, I think old farts around me are the ones who always find faults, trying to make my life difficult just because they feel that I have not accorded them enough respect. Yeah, let’s teach that little shit some lessons. And just to make it clear, so far I only consistently have issues with certain people and they tend to belong to that old farts club. So I made my reference from there.You old fart reading this, please do not get offended. Not everything is about you, old fuck.

Ah, I better stop here before I sound like an old fart.

p/s I hope I would not be the kind of old fart I hate when I am officially an old fart, physically. You readers have the divine duty to whack me into sense should that happen, then.

This is an attempt… at writing a post.

This is an attempt to write a post after I have not been writing any for the past 6 months.

I have no idea what I should write. I have written enough on Twitter on Lynas and Erykah Badu I don’t feel like repeating it here.

Something senseless. I should write something that doesn’t make sense. Like the direction of this post is going.

Okay. Few lines. That is a start. At least it is longer than 140 characters. Yamateh Bong! Yamateh!

p/s: Bear me with folks. Just warming up.

The (Half) Idiot’s Guide to Bersih 2.0

1. What is Bersih?

Bersih is ‘tak kotor‘, which means clean in Malay. I thought we all naturally support anything that is clean? You suka kotor?

On November 10, 2007, Malaysians from all walks of life whose had NBTD took a boring walk (well, not so for those who had to dodge tear gasses &  chemical water cannons at some points, no offence) while looking silly in yellow shirt, yellow headband, yellow handbags, yellow pants, yellow skin or any hint of yellow colour on them from several locations towards Istana Negara to send a memorandum to the King demanding electoral reform. The demands were:

1. Usage of indelible ink (which has already been agreed to by the Electoral Commission, which then canceled it off at the last hour before 2008 General Election)

2. Clean-up of registered voters roll (what took them so long so hard to do it, really?)

3. Abolition of  postal votes, and (not done)

4. All candidates and political parties have equal access to print and broadcast media. (not done)

Close to 20 people were arrested and no policemen were injured during the rally. Some went back with wet t-shirt and teary-looking eyes, thanks to some trigger happy dudes who swore to protect and serve the citizens.

2. What is Bersih 2.o?

Bersih 2.0 is a repeat of  the first rally, as a follow up (it is good to follow up don’t you think?), scheduled July 9th, 2011  to again demand for electoral reform, since the Election Commisson (EC) slept through the demands for the past three and a half years. Well, you have to try again right? Why we need another rally? Why can’t we sit down and discuss? Well, we have done discussing and it is time to make a point. The EC has been postponing discussions, giving excuses and more lame excuses all this while and suddenly now come Bersih 2.0 they want to discuss again? (while giving ultimatum to Bersih to call off the rally. Seriously? You care about the rally or the demands for electoral reform?)

3. Is Bersih 2.0 a political ploy to topple the government, CIA’s agent, trying to revive communism, a tool by Muslim haters and <create-your-own-cock-and-bull-theories here..>?

Look at the 8 demands  by Bersih 2.0 :

1. Clean up the electoral roll. Again. (what fucking took the EC so long to do it? Bunch of incompetent goons.)

2. Reform postal voting. Again. (still not done and the EC actually makes it harder now for postal votes counting process to be impartial with some stupid new rules, I cannot remember it so you google it up)

3. Use of indelible ink. Again. (nothing done over this promise by EC and now they are suggesting for the use of biometric system. You cannot even implement this cheap indelible ink idea you want to use biometric system? Are you dumb?)

4. Introduce a minimum 21-day campaign period. (this is a new demand, because the EC is blardy inconsistent with the given campaign period. 21 day is just right, not too long, not too short and should be enough time for all parties to prepare for D-day. 1st election this country had, campaign period was 42 days. Now? 2 weeks. Some voters don’t even know who are the candidates in some elections.)

5. Allow all parties free and equal access the media. Again. (well, you need a fair, equal footing or fighting ground for a fair fight and to win the fight respectably.)

6. Strengthen public institution. (I am not quite sure how asking EC to fulfill this demand)

7. Stop corruption. (during the election time, some parties often resorted to pork-barrel corruption, going blatantly without regards to the laws)

8. Stop dirty politics. (Well, yeah. It’s only dirty when you want it to be dirty. We should aim for election where candidates talk about policies they offer to voters. Not about sex. Slander.)

Any of the demands above is political? Bias to any political party? And if any of the demands above is achieved, does it has anything to do with communism, religion, foreign espionage bla bla bla? Opposition parties are seen openly supporting Bersih 2.0 because they always have been at disadvantage in any election and they just want an equal chances to win the people’s votes. Isn’t that a fair request? All political parties should demand for this, an equal chance. Unless you’re a quack.

And just because many opposition parties are supporting Bersih 2.o it is an opposition agenda?  How you know for sure by having a reformed electoral system, the opposition will win for sure if there is any election? If they put donkey candidate, they may not win the election. Is it because of donkey, monkey, frog also can win in any election now that we need an electoral reform.

4. I still think the best way is to vote wisely during the election.

How you are going to make sure your vote is worth what it is if the system is not fair? Your vote can be canceled out anytime by deceased voters ‘coming back’ to vote, sudden influx of postal votes because the system is not clean enough. Why Malaysians overseas are having a tough time trying to fulfill their responsibility because the EC is not taking enough steps to help or let them vote? Why allow postal votes for some groups and not others when they are all cannot be present physically at their constituency during polling day? Fair?

5. I cannot join Bersih 2.0 rally because…

Afraid? The government wants you to be afraid. That is why the intimidation and over the top reactions by the government to stop anything about Bersih 2.0. Well, you can be isolated, be ignored, be attacked, be in doubt, be frightened but DO NOT be silenced. Our life begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. There is strength in numbers, for that we shall fear and be silenced. The weak can become strong when they are united.

If you cannot be physically there, you can choose to show your support in many ways. Like looking stupid wearing yellow on that day.

If you don’t support Bersih 2.0 rally, well it’s your choice. This is a democratic country. As long as your conscience permits.

Any more questions on Bersih 2.0? I am lazy to ask question on my own and then answer them. Why don’t you write any question, comment, curse, profanity  in the comment box and this self appointed Bersih 2.0 know-it-all shall respond. *smug*

Rest in peace, Pa.

This post is in memory of my late father who passed away on 14th April 2011. It has been 2 weeks now.

I did not get to see my father often, growing up. He was always away for work or went ‘missing’ and I kinda used to not having him around. I especially remember those times when some strangers came to our house looking for him and he would be ‘missing’ for a period of time, yet again. Or when we thought he was leaving to his workplace and suddenly few hours after he left or the very next day (depending on the distance of the location he supposed to go) there would be calls looking for him asking why he has not arrived at his workplace and followed by some ’stories’ about him, yet again.

Life back then was tough for our family. I have the utmost respect for my mother for shouldering on everything, taking care of the family in what ever possible ways she could. At one point, I gave up and decided not to give a damn about my old man when he yet pulled another trick of him on us. I think it  happened just last year. I was very disappointed and angry, rightly so. We siblings are all grown ups now, tired of having the broken record keep playing itself and so I called for a stop, because enough is enough.

Although, ironically funny when I really think about it how at one time I was living the life I despise so much for the reason it was the life that he lives all this while. Trying not to be the person you hate and end up close to be one, you have to love the irony. Life is a bitch like that. Well, I have to thank whatever magic forces out there for spanking me back to the right path, if there’s any.

For the past 1-2 years my father has been staying at home, playing ‘housemaker’, whipping up dishes – one thing he was exceptionally good at, looking after the place while my mother and my younger brother working. And I was a busy wandering nomad and would be back home once or twice in a month, whenever I could make time for it. He would always call me when he knew I would be back for the weekend asking when I would arrive and telling me what dishes awaiting me. I especially love the five-spice meat rolls he made.

Just when I thought this year is going to be the best year for us, well.. apparently not. I couldn’t wait for Chinese New Year last February and I made many arrangements so we could celebrate this year with a bang. I even bought some firecrackers, (I always scold my younger brother for stupidly ‘burning money’), got a new ride, gave my mom early big ang-pow so we could spend a little bit more this year and hopefully it would be great and wonderful new year. Turned out the damn saying that money is not everything is kinda true after all.

It was 2 weeks before Chinese New Year. He was carrying groceries and stuffs he bought for CNY and suddenly he fainted at the front door. The neighbours, my mother and younger brother called an ambulance and rushed him to the hospital. I was working in Bintulu and I went back the next day when I heard the news. I visited him at the hospital, talked to the doctors and they couldn’t be sure what caused him to faint. He was discharged 3 days after that and I went back to work.

2 days before the big dinner for CNY, I received a call from my mother saying that my father fainted again. I was supposed to go back on the next day, so I drove back immediately after I got the news. I went to the general hospital in Sarikei again, checked with the doctors and they couldn’t give any convincing answers so we requested for him to be transferred to Sibu hospital where they have better equipments and facilities to find out what happened to my father. I took the ride in the ambulance to Sibu, accompanied him for the MRI scan and the doctor told me they found 2 lumps in my father’s brain, suspected tumors. My father also complained about the pain at his back and he couldn’t sit or stand and walk due to the pain, which they then found to be his bones have slipped off and cracked. Further check-ups, testings were carried out to confirm the prognosis, my father was admitted to the hospital for a week and I would fetch my mother up and down Sibu – Sarikei during the Chinese New Year period. Doctors suspected my father of having cancer but couldn’t pin point the source, which they needed more testings and time.

I went back to work on the 7th day of CNY after visiting him at the ward. He was discharged on the 9th day of CNY after his back pain subsided, they gave him some medications and went home while waiting for the results to come out. A week later he went to the hospital together with my mother and younger brother to collect the result and he fainted again while chatting with the nurses. This time they got his blood test results ready and after further testings and check ups, it was confirmed he was a Stage 4 liver cancer patient.

I was talking to the doctor on the phone, exploring available options, what were the chances and after considering everything we decided to bring him home to recuperate and we would try to spend more time with him. I was told by the doctor that because it was a Stage 4 liver cancer, he would probably have only another 6-7 months more to live. Starting then I would be sure to make time to go back home every weekends to see him.

A week before he left for a better place, I went home. My mother was telling me he was asking about me the day before and has been grumbling about his messy, uncut hair. He couldn’t walk without assistance at this time, so my mother told him that I would come back at the end of the week and be his barber. Yes, I was a very sought after barber when I was in school and uni, no joke.

After his discharge from the hospital he had not fainted again, until a day before I went back to cut his hair. When I reached home, he was in the room and my mother told me, he fainted in the morning the day before and became very weak ever since. He also seems to be unable to control his toilet business anymore. My younger brother and I went to buy some adult diapers for him. I cut his hair and helped him to shave, then carried him to the bathroom. He was very frail and weak. It was Saturday.

I went back to work on Sunday after telling them I would come back on next Friday to vote. I received a call from my mother on Thursday morning, around 7.50am. My father had been unconscious since 3am in the morning and they have admitted him to hospital and currently in coma. She said she would called me again if there’s any progress and I went to take my shower. 5 minutes after that, when I was still in the shower my phone rang again, it was my mother again. “Your father has left us”, she said.

We have made all the necessary arrangements that followed after. I hope I have done  my best as the eldest son in the family.

I would like to thank everyone for their helps, supports and kind wishes during this period. I am forever indebted and deeply grateful for every assistance given. Thank you, again.

Lastly,

Rest in peace, Pa.