Saiful Bukhari | The Flaccid Mind

Sodomee may cause constipation??

Wednesday, July 2nd, 2008 24 views

(Image source: TV Smith)

This is too funny… Nyahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Take note, next time if you have constipation problem, your doctor may ask you some ‘disturbing questions’ such as:

You: Yor Doc, I have trouble passing my crap for the pass few days. I feel constipated.

Doctor: Errm..hrmm hmm… Did you have anal sex before?

You: No!

Doctor: Did you ‘accidentally’ put any object in your anus before?

You: Of course not!

Had you been sodomised?

Me:

ROTFLMAOWLKITA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

From NST:

Police classify case as sodomy

KUALA LUMPUR: The sexual assault report against Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim has been classified as sodomy.

This was the first time police have revealed that investigations had started after earlier saying that the allegations were mere heresay.

Yesterday, Deputy Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Ismail Omar put to rest speculation about the investigations.

“The case has been classified as sodomy,” he told the New Straits Times, adding that he could not comment further as investigations were still going on.

It was, however, learnt that police had classified the case as sodomy after receiving the medical report on the accuser, Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan, who was an aide to the Parti Keadilan Rakyat de facto leader.

On Sunday, Federal CID director Datuk Bakri Zinin had urged the public not to speculate on the case, saying police needed time to probe the allegations, which at the time, were merely hearsay.Mohd Saiful, 23, had lodged a police report on Saturday, alleging that he had been sodomised by his boss, Anwar, several times.On Monday, police forensics personnel were seen going into a unit at the Desa Damansara condominiums here in Damansara Heights, where the alleged incident took place.

On allegations by a relative of Mohd Saiful that several police stations had earlier refused to accept his report after he named Anwar as the “assailant”, Ismail said they were investigating that claim.

Mohd Saiful, meanwhile, is believed to be under police protection. His family claimed that they have had no news from him ever since he lodged the report on Saturday night.

Checks yesterday also revealed that doctors at the Kuala Lumpur Hospital, after a battery of tests, found indications that Mohd Saiful had engaged in anal sex.

The New Straits Times learnt that doctors had taken stool samples for further investigation.

It was believed that Mohd Saiful had also complained of constipation when he was taken to the Hospital Kuala Lumpur outpatient ward.

Doctors, however, found something amiss during the check-up and upon questioning Mohd Saiful, learnt that he had been sodomised.

Checks on the Internet reveal that acute or forced sodomy can cause constipation. A University Malaya Medical Centre doctor said fear, mental trauma and the physical act could have caused the constipation.

“An anal tear and the pain could have resulted in the victim having difficulty in passing motion.”

HAHAHAHA! What? Checks on the Internet? Imagine this reporter googling ‘constipation+sodomy’. Hmm.. contrary to popular beliefs that anal sex ‘loosen’ the passage and make it easier for you to crap, it will cause constipation? I am enlightened again! For all this while I thought constipation happenned because either you have piles, lack of fibre or didn’t drink enough water!!! Pardon my ignorance. :oops:

Then, since when a person suffering from constipation need to go to the Kuala Lumpur General Hospital to be checked? Go normal general practitioner will do lah! An enema will solve the problem. So many DOCTORS to check on constipation instead of a doctor.

Community message from The Flaccid Mind :

Stay away from hammering someone’s backside or allowing back entry. It is CONSTIPATING.

Warning by the government of Malaysia

Under Section 377A of the Penal code, ‘any person who has sexual connection with another person by the introduction of the penis into the anus or mouth of the other person is said to commit carnal intercourse against the order of nature’.

The offence is punishable by a jail term of up to 20 years and whipping, as stated under Section 377B.

Layman term: In layman speak, it means it’s a crime for any man to engage in anal sex or penile oral sex — fellatio aka blowjob, consensual or not.

Wait… what a sexist law!! Discriminating against men… note the ‘penis’ word. If you look at the way it’s phrased, it looks as though it’s only the men, the person who inserts the penis into the mouth of another, who will be prosecuted. It means the woman will go scot free, whether it’s consensual or otherwise???

ps: NH, ini lah time kalau ada awek doctor, ko boleh tanya.. benda-benda technical Then aku sebagai kawan, boleh tumpang tanya jugak! Usaha lagi!

*ROTFLMAOWLKITA- Rolling on floor laughing my ass off with legs kicking in the air.

Popularity: 6% [?]

Posted in Crap, Current Affairs, Humour, Mainstream Media, Silly | 23 Comments »

Want government scholarship? Go DPM’s office.

Tuesday, July 1st, 2008 84 views

What do all of you think about Najib’s answer regarding to the “victim” picture taken in his office?

Najib: I have no link to Anwar’s accuser or case

KUALA LUMPUR: Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak said he was not connected in any way to the sodomy allegations against Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim.

Parti Keadilan Rakyat officials had on Sunday attempted to tie Najib to Anwar’s accuser by producing a picture of the latter in the foyer of the deputy prime minister’s office.

“I am not involved at all in the case. The picture was taken three months ago.”

Najib said the Anwar aide who made the allegations had come to his office on Feb 12 seeking help to obtain a scholarship from the government.

“He was a student leader and met my officer. He also took pictures with other leaders,” he said at the Parliament lobby yesterday after chairing a meeting of the cabinet committee on foreign workers.

Elaborating in a statement to Bernama, Najib said the aide was a former student of Universiti Tenaga Nasional (Uniten) while the officer in the photograph was responsible for, among other things, higher education.“It is normal for guests, particularly students, who come to the office of the deputy prime minister to pose for photographs with officers as a record of their visit.”

(Source: NST)

Now, I am very very curios. How on earth that he would come out with an answer that the “victim” came to his office for his assistance to obtain government scholarship?

1) The victim is a drop-out of UNITEN…why he need a scholarship? From NST - Accuser a varsity dropout:

KUALA LUMPUR: The man who alleged he was sodomised by Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim is a former student leader who recently quit his studies.

He was an office-holder in the university’s student representative council for the 2006/2007 session.

However, the 23-year-old quit his studies after failing to make the grade.

The accuser is also said to have recently become engaged to a former college -mate.

Several postings on the Internet have also been attributed to him.

He said after achieving a grade point average of 1.69 in three semesters, he decided to quit university.

Average of 1.69 in three semesters = Gagal Berhenti = Failed = Forced to quit. For UTM, the grading system:

3.70-4.00 ( 1st class)

3.00-3.69 (2nd class upper)

2.30-2.99 (2nd class lower)

2.00 -2.29 (3rd class)

Below 2.00 (failed)

I think it is standard for all universities, below 2.00 means failed. The student is not allowed to continue his/her course if he/she obtained such grade. So, what a drop-out student doing at DPM’s office asking for scholarship? He is not even qualified for any scholarship, for ba-da-wee’s sake! Unless government scholarships are for dropouts. :arrow:

2) Can an ordinary Malaysian meet Najib’s officer for assistance to obtain government scholarship? What is so special about the victim that he can ask assistance directly from the DPM’s office?

I didn’t know that is possible. Now I know. Hey people!! Get your sons and daughters lining up in front of DPM’s office fast!! Wait, you are not special so don’t bother applying or asking for assistance from his office.

3) The officer is the photo is Khairil Anas Yusof, Najib’s special officer. Oh, he is in charge of , to quote Najib, “among other things, higher education.”? Why do we need Minister of Education or Minister of Higher Education then?

Well, probably Saiful Bukhari went to see him for a letter of support to apply for scholarship which is quite normal. Thing is, why go to DPM’s office and why to see this particular officer but not other officers? So much of ‘coincidence’ eh? This is not normal.

I leave you all with this quote from Malaysiakini.

“The notion that a 61-year old with a bad back can forcibly sodomise a strapping 23-year old is laughable. This is simply not the kind of thing that anyone, not even Anwar’s harshest critic, is going to believe.”

ps: For ba-da-wee’s sake - This is used as an exclamation to show exasperation or irritation.

Popularity: 7% [?]

Posted in BN-ism, Current Affairs, Mainstream Media, News, Rants | 17 Comments »

Anwar Ibrahim accused of ’sodomy’, again??! Old trick?

Sunday, June 29th, 2008 73 views

I woke up this morning to receive a shocking sms from NH.

“Dude wake up. Anwar accused of sodomy again”

I tried to reply his sms and fired up my Digi Internet but to no avail, because I did not pay my outstanding bill haha! End up calling Digi and made the payment through the phone. Only now I have the chance to get on the internet and read on the issue.

I have yet to read much on this but.. just few comments and interesting links to share.

So, another sodomy report against Anwar Ibrahim? Come on, come up with something new. Old trick cannot be used many times. Bodoh! This is the second time that such a report had been lodged in over 10 years. According to the police report filed by his 23-year-old aide yesterday, the sodomy allegedly committed by de facto PKR leader Anwar Ibrahim took place “in a condo in the Damansara area”. The following police report was made on 28 June 2008 at 5.45 PM by Mohd Saiful Bukhari bin Azlan, who turns 23 next week (IC No. 850706-01-5687):

“Saya Mohd Saiful Bukhari b Azlan ingin melaporkan bahawa saya telah diliwat oleh majikan saya. Perkara ini berlaku tanpa kerelaan saya. Kejadian terakhir berlaku 26/6/08 di Unit 1151, Kondominium Desa Damansara, Jln Setia Kasih, KL. Oleh itu, tujuan laporan ini dibuat untuk mendapat pembelaan dan keadilan keatas diri saya. Saya juga berasa bimbang dengan keselamatan diri dan keluarga saya jika perkara ini tersebar luas di khalayak ramai. Majikan saya Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim - Ketua Umum PKR.”

Me: The accuser does not have a time where the incident was alleged to have happen. What kind of sloppy, dumb report is this? How is the accused going to prepare his defense of alibi?

Let us look at the whole thing carefully.

What are the information that we have? In this issue we should take a look the background of the individuals involved.

1st, Anwar Ibrahim (AI). He was accused of sodomy and corruption in 1998. He was found guilty for both charges but the sodomy charge was overturned, six years after he served his time in jail. There are many rumours flying around regarding AI sexuality. Some swore that they saw AI dating ‘lelaki jambu’(pretty boy) before. (Hmm… those who admitted that AI sodomised them - Dr. Munawar and AI’s driver both also not handsome and jambu. Fugly. Sukma? Well.. I don’t want to comment, leave that to STP hahahaha! :D) Only AI and his god knows whether he did what he was accused. I personally think he is not into backdoor entry and even if he is, that is his personal choice. I reserved the same opinion for Chua Soi Lek. I am not supporting the actions, but I sure condemn those that forever on their high moral pedestals - self elected moral guardians. Self appointed moral guardians irk me. Get a life, pls?

2nd. Who is Saiful Bukhari - the accuser? According to many inviduals that personally know this guy, he is what we call ‘a wolf in sheep’s clothing’. Malays say ‘Musang berbulu ayam’. The are reports saying this guy was Najib’s strong man, ex-UMNO guy. He gained entry to AI political circle through his friend after ‘repented’ and left AMNO.

Saiful Bukhari, the accuser. Jambu??

(Image source: here)

There are few interesting links to read on this: (Take note of the entries’ date and read the comments. The comments are more interesting than the entries.)

Selamat Maju Jaya, Saiful

Musang Berbulu-Ayam Part 1

Musang Berbulu Ayam Part 2

Musang Berbulu Ayam Part 3

Hujah

We also aware of certain profilic individuals such as Musa Hassan and Gani Patail and their ‘involvements’ in the conviction of AI. Musa Hassan was the investigating officer at that time (Probably if you followed the case closely you will remember he’s guy carrying the ’semen-ted’ mattress to the court) and Gani Patail was the case prosecutor. Could be a vendetta? After they failed to convict AI?

Done with actors’ biodatas. Let’s look at the situation of background of the story.

After 8 Mac political tsunami, weakness of the BN-led government under Abdullah Ahmad Badawi is getting more obvious. The government is getting lesser support as time goes by especially after few unpopular decisions made by him such as raising the fuel price, sidelining East Malaysian leaders from his cabinet and exerting pressures against and pulling out people’s projects from Pakatan Rakyat-ruled states. He is making a lot of enemies from inside and outside AMNO. (too long to list out). He will be dethroned anytime soon and his party (read BN) may lose power of the country. He is in a situation what we call ‘deep shit’.

Abdullah is not the only person to feel the heat. His second man, Najib and the infamous Rosmah Mansor - Najib’s wife also feeling the heat especially after RPK made a Statutory Declaration implicating Rosmah in Altantuya’s murder case. The case becomes too hot to handle, even Najib and his wife were forced to respond to the media.

Anwar - deemed the new hope of Malaysia. Widely acknowledged as ‘Prime Minister in waiting’. He is seen to the the only person capable to steer Malaysia and ’save’ Malaysia from catastrophic doomsday. He is gaining more supports from the ground after the encouraging result for the opposition (especially his party - PKR) in the March 2008 General Election. Despite receiving more supports, he is also bombarded with all sort of allegations in the MSM without any access given to him to defend or reply to the allegations.

Latest allegation? He sodomised Saiful Bahari.

My take? These are few questions and comments to ponder about:

1. Abdullah is trying to kill many birds with one stone. RPK, Najib, and Anwar Ibrahim. Who would think he will do this? But then again, who would think he would remarry again (after he denied it previously), dissolve the parliament (after saying the exact opposite the previous day?) and increased the fuel price as much as 40% to RM2.70 (after he was saying otherwise the previous day?) Abdullah Ahmad Badawi is capable of many things.

2. I think it is a pathetic show and desperate attempt by the corrupted government to save its ass and after a decade, is this still relevant?

3. This is may be an attempt to sidetrack us from major issues - C4 , Altantuya and the Statutory Declaration by RPK. They are trying to badawise us! We are stupid but we are not badawi! Note: Saiful Bukhari was close to Najib before. This explosive news probably is to divert the attention from Najib and other dead horses to AI.

4. So how does that 35 year-old (now 45 years old) virgin fit into all this? Remember Ummi Hafilda? Out of nowhere she came into the picture? Is she going to make her appearance again?

5. Are we going to see the parade of mattresses again? Hey they probably dust the old mattress and use it as evident in court again. Bring in on!

6. Probably we should ask Ezam Mat Noor? He was a close aide to Anwar and now he is busy attacking AI. Probably he was sodomised before as well? Huh, after 10 years of the Anwar’s sodomy case, nobody come out and say ‘I was sodomise and this is the farking proof’. What we had was some individuals went to lodge police reports against AI. Why straightly go to the police? Go to TV3, show medical reports, photos to the world if it is true. Why police first? The pattern is there. Same old pattern. Boring. Dumb.

7. What a lame reproduction.

Why not come up with a new plot? While they are at it, why not accuse AI of Altantuya’s murder? Create some stories like actually AI was having affair with Altantuya, then also sodomised some boys and Altantuya found up, she went berserked and AI killed him?? Be creative lah! Old trick cannot be used many times!!!!!!!!

Anwar Ibrahim’s press statement : Read here.

Interesting video to watch. Did Anwar Ibrahim perform sodomy? Here is one good post:

Did Anwar Perform Sodomy? Some Video Confessions. (Check out the videos) This is another video on Anwar’s corruption and sodomy charges, check out how wonderful our ex-Prime Minister using his selective memory to ’skirt around’ the questions asked by the interviewer.

ps: I used/translated some of the points mentioned in this post by BumiLangit. I hope he doesn’t mind. A good post must be shared. A lazy blogger like me, just copy-lah! NH posted an entry on this as well.

pss: Some of points are just my flaccid mind’s imaginations at work. Please take it with many pinchs of salt.

psss: All this events eerily similar in comparison with a certain African politician - Moo-gah-beh doings.. to stay in power at all cost, at whatever it takes.